How to deal with anger between husband and wife
First, learn to analyze unreasonable anger. In daily work and life, often because of unhappiness or dissatisfaction with others, the most common reaction is anger.
Many people think that their anger is reasonable and should erupt, and the fault is on others, but this is not necessarily the case. Most of the anger is unreasonable.
Psychological analysis found three sources of unreasonable anger: First, selfish requirements can be met.
Selfishness is a source of undue anger.
The more selfish a person is, the more angry he will be.
In other words, when you just ask someone in your personal position, you will pick up the faults of others or you will always feel that you are emotionally and emotionally disadvantaged and get angry.
So sometimes our anger is caused by selfishness. If we should calm ourselves down first, then forgive each other.
Second, the requirements of perfectionism cannot be met.
This is more manifested in my own anger towards myself. I am always angry because I fail to meet the requirements I have in mind. When I feel that I cannot satisfy my desires and requirements, an emotion of self-demobilization and self-denial comes to my face.At the same time, when you find that your ability is not better than others, you will lose your confidence in life. Then inferiority is a kind of self-anger, and it is also the anger that abuses you. This is also the most common psychological manifestation of depression and obsessive-compulsive disorder.
In addition, the same is true of others, always standing in the position of perfectionist and asking others to satisfy themselves, hoping that others will do things according to their own intentions.
A person with a suspicion will often misinterpret the motives of others, always doubting that their actions may cause harm to themselves, and always think that others have any intentions about themselves.
Therefore, when you want to be angry, ask yourself if your anger is reasonable. If it is related to the three above, it is unreasonable. Let the irrational anger disappear.
Second, learn to express your anger through the above-mentioned introspective rational thinking, and confirm that your anger is reasonable, then you should face it bravely.
This is another way to eliminate anger.
Why express anger?
1. Being good at expressing our anger helps us to rationally understand the truth of the facts, and at the same time effectively suppresses hindering consciousness and depression.
If you do n’t dare to say anything, your inner imbalance suppresses you all day, and you have no mood to be happy at all. This is also the negative thinking that causes your depression, and you have a face that is aggrieved or unforgiving.
2, reasonable expression of anger helps us to forgive each other in a timely manner.
People need to vent their anger, that is, play the function of deflation, letting out all the internal grievances and dissatisfaction. When one is relaxed, it is easy to accept others’ mistakes. When you are angry, you often see yourself.Accepting others is easier only when you are calm.
3. Use our decent words to express our anger, and tell the other party to express their anger for understanding, not for revenge, so that the other party is more willing to learn to respect and care.
4. Effective anger helps us prevent gossip.
Settle your own affairs, and resolve the matter between the two people immediately. Don’t listen to what other people think. Proper explanations can easily cause mutual trust between the two sides.
5, good at using appropriate language to express anger is conducive to calm the strong psychology of a violent personality.
The stronger you are in the face of strength, the less self-sustaining impact will result, but choosing too weak will indulge the opponent ‘s strong mentality, and you will never find the opportunity to stand up.
So proper anger is a complement to strength, and it’s also the best way to take Roch.
For example, men are most afraid of women’s tears. If you shed tears to get angry, the other party will be discouraged.
6. Proper anger helps to increase the rhythm of communication between the two parties.
If silence is an intolerable negative manifestation, it can be said that anger is a positive element.
With proper anger, it will attract the attention of the other party, and it is also a good positive message for the couple.
Therefore, if people have learned a rational communication attitude and skills, no matter when and when they face anyone, you will be confident.
Recognition is reasonable, and you will not give up, but recognizing yourself is unreasonable, you have to deal with others.
Letting others go is actually giving you a sincere opportunity.
Third, deal with the anger of the day in time, learn to forgive each other before going to bed, and don’t let your anger be.
Anger happens and disappears at any time, but if you always put it in your heart and you can’t bear it, then it will deteriorate in your heart.
It may turn into resentment or it may turn into negative emotions for life.
Fourth, do not resent or revenge the account in mind only remember happy things, only remember the good and lovely of others, refuse to record the bad and anger of others.
Let your mind be more open and your personality more cheerful. Don’t let your mind shrink, let alone your heart be filled with any hatred, let us be more frank and simple, maybe we will be happier and worry-free.